Pretense
by Random1377
Summary: A brief journey into a past that never was. ...hopefully.  T for some disturbing ideas.


Disclaimer: Studio Gainax owns the rights to all characters and concepts for Neon Genesis Evangelion. This story is not authorized by Studio Gainax, and will be removed from the web should they request it.

Pretense

By Random1377

Gendou Ikari fumbled for the alarm clock, cursing in the darkness of the pre-dawn as the strident _eent__ eent eent_ blasted his dim, troubling dreams into oblivion. Bleary-eyed, he squinted at the clock, nodding to himself as he remembered resetting it for 5:18 to ensure that he was on time for the opening ceremony for the new operations facility.

Gehrin was dead… long live NERV.

He picked up his glasses, sliding them on with a barely audible sigh as a strange sound echoed through the apartment. _Not again,_ he thought grimly, climbing out of bed and moving quietly to the bedroom door to peek into the kitchen. _Not today…_

"Rei," he called firmly, sliding the bedroom door open and stepping out, "what do you have there?"

Rei Ayanami, Gendou's charge, glanced over her shoulder, trying to hide a square, brownish object in her lap. "Nothing, Commander," she replied docilely. "Good morning."

Gendou's lips compressed to a thin line. "Rei," he said flatly, "show me."

"Yes sir," Rei whispered, slowly bringing out a small, slightly battered shoebox.

Raising his eyes from the box, Gendou coolly murmured, "Haven't we discussed this, Rei?"

"Yes sir," the girl repeated, setting the box on the table and rising to her feet. "Animals are to be kept outside at all times."

As if to punctuate this point, a small chirp sounded from the inside of the box, accompanied by a fluttering of wings.

"Why have you disobeyed me?"

Rei kept her eyes submissively low. "It is… injured, Commander," she said slowly, unconsciously straightening her skirt before remembering the house rule against fidgeting. "Its wing is broken. I felt that I could help."

Gendou glanced at the clock on the far wall, his mind already moving forward with the mental preparations for the day's events. "Put it back outside, Rei," he said quietly, "you have until my return this afternoon."

"Understood."

With a polite bow, Rei returned to her seat, carefully lifting the lid from the box and staring down at the creature within.

Walking towards the fridge, Gendou gave a cursory glance to the contents of the box, finding a small, clearly wounded sparrow within. Its right wing hung limply by its side as it hopped from one side of the box to the other, fluttering its left wing in a futile attempt to fly home.

He shook his head in distaste.

This was the fourth injured animal the soon-to-be First Child had brought home in the last three weeks… and it never ended well. For some reason, the girl had a talent for picking the most grievously wounded creatures to tend, and sadly, it seemed that she lacked the first-aid skills to back her desires.

_She is young yet,_ he reminded himself, glancing at the top of Rei's politely downcast head, _she'll grow out of this 'phase' or whatever it is long before it becomes a hindrance to her piloting._

As this was the second Rei, Gendou was a bit unsure as to what her normal behavior pattern would be. She had been bred to be obedient and respectful, but past that, she had few parameters – and professor Takayumi, one of her co creators had mentioned that each clone may have a few quirks during the initial year of release.

Or at least, that's what Gendou remembered. Asking him would be difficult now, of course.

Gendou was very thorough in cleaning up loose ends.

"I'll be going now," he announced, deciding to skip breakfast entirely. "Remember what I said, Rei."

"Of course, Commander. Goodbye."

"Goodbye."

Giving the box another look, Gendou went into the bedroom and dressed, leaving the girl and her bird without another word.

( 0 0 0 )

"Things seem to be moving along well enough," Kouzo Fuyutsuki commented as the car he was sharing with the Commander pulled up to the younger man's dwelling. "The MAGI are online… Units 00 and 01 are nearing the operational lines on all required systems – and at this rate, they will be fully functional well before the next messenger arrives."

"Mm," Gendou hummed. "We should accelerate completion of both units. I want them combat ready as soon as possible."

Fuyutsuki nodded. "Naturally," he said smoothly, "which is why crews are already working around the clock. You can't alter time, Ikari." When the other man simply stared, Fuyutsuki cleared his throat. "Besides," he pointed out, "we only have one pilot at this time."

"I've already put in the order to have the Second 'found,'" Gendou murmured, "if push comes to shove, we can ship her here at several hours notice."

"Here's hoping it doesn't come to that," Fuyutsuki mused. "What about Rei? Is she prepared?"

Gendou nodded absently, glancing out the window at his small house. "She is," he said slowly, "though…"

"Is there a problem?"

"No," Gendou said, rubbing his eyes, "just some lingering doubts – nothing that can be fully dispelled before she's actually piloting."

Fuyutsuki pondered this for a moment. "Anything you'd care to share with your sub-commander?"

Shaking his head, Gendou replied, "Not just yet. It's just her emotional attitude… her frigidity."

"That was how she was… programmed," Fuyutsuki pointed out, hesitating over the last word enough that it drew the Commander's attention.

"You still disapprove."

Fuyutsuki shrugged. "I've made my stance clear," he said coolly. "Yui would be appalled."

"Yui," Gendou corrected, "would understand."

"Mm."

Seeing no point in continuing the conversation, Gendou opened the door and climbed out of the car. "Thank you for your hard work," he said evenly, "I will see you tomorrow."

"Until then, Commander," Fuyutsuki said politely.

Closing the door, Gendou made his way up the path towards the small, almost idyllic house he had chosen as his own. It was small and compact – almost tidy, though he hated this pedantic word – with flower boxes in the front and a small row of bushes on the left side of the house… all tended by a professional gardening service, of course.

The very idea of having enough time to water flowers nearly made the man laugh out loud.

He was on the verge of mounting the steps when he noticed a small, skirt-clad bottom peeking out from between two of the bushes. He frowned, rounding the house to find Rei kneeling on the ground, intently digging at the roots of the bushes.

_No, not digging,_ he corrected, spying the small cardboard box at her side, _burying._

Gendou watched as Rei solemnly scooped handfuls of dirt over yet another small, innocuous little grave. "Your sparrow?" he asked, noting with some satisfaction that the girl did not flinch in the slightest.

"Yes sir," she said quietly, smoothing the mound before dusting her hands against each other. "Its injuries were more severe than I anticipated."

"Mm, I see," Gendou said neutrally, "well, wash your hands, it's time for dinner."

"Yes sir."

"And Rei."

"Yes?"

"This is the last time, do you understand?"

"…yes."

"Good."

( 0 0 0 )

Four months passed. With the new facility, and hiring the staff for it, Gendou barely took notice of Rei at all. He still ate with her, and he made sure that her development was progressing as it should, but if she had been his own child, he definitely would have qualified as an absentee parent.

Most children would have been put out or hurt by this neglect… but Rei was not like other children – on so many levels that a lesser man would have been terrified by the mere existence of her. Gendou was not a lesser man, of course, and as he had been instrumental in her 'birth' into this world, he was very well aware of her requirements.

He had, after all, engineered her to be self-sufficient.

"Rei, where did you put my brown shoes?"

Glancing at his watch one overly-hot Sunday, Gendou found himself getting later and later.

_She must have moved them when she was cleaning in the entryway, _he mused, heading into the kitchen to find the girl. _It's just a matter of finding out where she put them._

Another quick look at his watch told him that he was going to be _very_ late if he could not find his shoes… not that it mattered much to him, of course. He was the Commander. A staff meeting could be delayed for him. He did not like the idea, though, as NERV was balanced on somewhat of a rather fine edge, and building loyalty and reputation was critical – and he had already needed to return to the house once, when he realized that he was wearing the wrong shoes, so time was already against him.

He stepped into the kitchen, and his brow drew down.

Rei was sitting at the table once more, and the battered shoebox was resting in front of her, her attentive eyes focused on its contents to the exclusion of everything else.

"Rei," he boomed, and this time, the girl _did_ jump.

"Commander," she said, quickly reaching for the cover to the box. "You-"

"Show me."

Rei's eyes immediately lowered.

"Yes sir…"

Gendou glanced into the box. "Rei," he said flatly, "did I not make myself clear the last time? I want no more of this!"

"Meow!"

He pursed his lips.

Kittens, while most women and children found them cute, were Gendou's least favorite animal. As far as he was concerned, they did nothing but lounge around as if they owned everything in sight, they were incapable of cleaning up after themselves, and they contributed nothing to a household other than hairballs and high-pitched mewling.

_Of course it would have to be a kitten…_

Rei began to fidget, but immediately stilled. "It is inju-"

"Yes, Rei," Gendou cut in sharply, "So I gather by its limping. This is the second time you have disobeyed me on this matter, Rei."

"I... could not simply leave it, Commander," Rei said quietly. "Please forgive my impertinence. It will not happen again."

"It had better not," Gendou warned. "Now… my brown shoes, where are they?"

"At the foot of your bed, sir."

"Goodbye, Rei."

"Goodbye, Commander."

( 0 0 0 )

Gendou spent most of the day going over the morning's events in his mind. No matter how he attacked it, he kept coming back to the idea that Rei… had willingly deceived him. She had waited until he had left to bring the kitten into the house, and tried to hide it from him when he had shown up unexpectedly.

How many times had this happened before? And what else was she hiding?

Frowning darkly, he decided that it was time to put an end to this matter. Calling Fuyutsuki, he announced that he would be leaving early.

_I will not have her disobeying me,_ he told himself, making his way to the car transport. _Tonight, we will resolve this matter._

The house was dark and quiet when he arrived, though he thought he could still hear the faint sound of the kitten meowing in the kitchen when he stepped through the door. Sliding his shoes off as quietly as he could, he stole across the floor, working consciously to avoid making any noise.

He tilted his head as a soft cracking sound reached his ears.

It almost sounded like the blue-haired girl was eating crackers, though this seemed unlikely as she usually waited for him to eat dinner.

Pushing the door open, Gendou watched closely as Rei slowly withdrew her hand from the box. _Trying to apply a splint after all this time?_ he asked himself, _or is this really all about wanting something to pet?_

There was something… not quite right with the scene. For one thing, Rei looked as if she had not moved since he had left for work, meaning that she had spent the entire day simply staring at the wounded kitten without even bothering to eat lunch. Another thing that struck him as odd was how intently her eyes fixed on the creature – focusing to the point of being nearly unblinking as she slowly raised the hand she had been petting the kitten with and gave it a tentative sniff.

"Rei."

Rei whipped around, her eyes shining in the darkness as she focused on his face.

"Commander…?"

Gendou stepped all the way into the kitchen. "What are you doing, Rei?" he said flatly. "I thought I told you…"

He trailed off as he glanced down into the box.

A frown creased the man's brow as he stared at the limp little body for a moment, a lazy thought passing through his mind before he could suppress it. _How many animals die from broken limbs? Correction – how many animals in Rei's ca-_

The thought cut off with an almost audible snap, reminding him of the sound of someone crunching on saltine crackers…

…or snapping a tiny bone.

"Rei."

"Yes sir?"

"This animal," Gendou gestured to the kitten, "what happened to it?"

Rei glanced down at the body. "I believe it was in a fight with a larger animal," she said slowly, "or perhaps… stepped on by a passing human."

Gendou moved closer.

"I don't see any injuries, other than its leg," he observed, watching Rei's face closely as she took this in.

"I would surmise that they are internal," the girl explained levelly. "Perhaps its organs were crushed, resulting in a slow degradation of its health until finally, it expired."

Gendou's eyes lingered on the cat's pathetically small head.

The last time he had seen the animal, it did not appear to be in agony. It was in pain, no doubt – a broken limb is a painful experience for any creature – but to have suffered the kind of injuries Rei suggested, Gendou was sure that the animal would have been making far more noise, and he doubted it would have been walking around on three legs, trying to find a way out of the box, if it was at death's door.

_Impossible,_ he thought, turning his attention to Rei's open, innocent face. _Not… possible._

Gendou stared into the girl's guileless eyes, her deep, deep… crafty, calculating eyes – barely catching the subtle hint of slithering, reptilian heartlessness before she managed to conceal it once more.

No… not Rei – not _his_ Rei! There was no way she could have hidden something like this from him all this time. Not possible.

But the truth was there. It was in the small corpse in the cardboard box. It was in the mock innocence in those bloody red eyes. It rose from the girl's tiny hands like the stink of carrion on a blisteringly hot summer day.

His First Child… was not well.

"Rei," the commander began, clearing his throat to eradicate the faint tremor in his voice, "you will live on your own from now on."

"Understood."

The pretense was gone. Rei's true face peered up at the man in all of its unclean glory – a tainted mask of flawed porcelain and curdled milk… a parody of humanity hiding a rotting, putrescent core.

Feeling that he was staring directly into the vile, nauseating spirit inside of the girl, Gendou pondered whether or not it would be beneficial to erase this one and release a third clone. _No,_ he thought wearily, _the problem isn't the vessel… it's the cargo._

That cargo, he mused… that precious, irreplaceable cargo.

For the key to his scenario, Gendou would sacrifice every bird and kitten in the entire city of Toyko-3.

…so long as Rei remained obedient, nothing else mattered.

"Dispose of this mess when you leave."

"Yes sir."

They stared at each other for several moments, and the entire time, Gendou had the oddest sensation that Rei might break into a sly grin at any second… but she simple met his eyes, seemingly saying, without a word, 'Don't worry, you weak little man, I may have some unusual tastes, but when the time comes, you'll get what you want.'

Gendou grunted.

"Goodbye, Rei."

"Goodbye, Commander."

Rei scooped the box into her arms and headed out the door without another word.

As soon as she was gone… Gendou locked it.

The End


End file.
